And we’re back!

Ok, I still don’t get Threads.

Before we jump in further…

If you’ve enjoyed this Millennial journey so far, please share this link on your Threads/LinkedIns/wherever. If you are reading this online and/or this was passed onto you, join me for future editions by clicking on the subscribe button below.

Additionally, I’m looking to add some guest spots to the newsletter. If you have any Millennial takes you want to share with the Curb Your Millennialism audience, reply to this email or find me on Twitter.

Deep(ish) Millennial Thought of the Week

Threads is still weird, right?

Last week, I did a deep dive into our first collective week with Threads (Part 1). You can read more of it to see what enlightenment and confusion the whole adventure caused me. Fast forward a week later, and I’m finding myself even more less enthused with Threads. It’s just a lot of chaos right now.

Axios rightfully pointed out three main drawbacks to the Threads experience which could get fixed in the near future, but currently make it very difficult to feel immersed and absorbed in it:

1. The feed isn’t in chronological order and it doesn’t highlight the people you follow well. My Elder Millennial brain does not wish to see out-of-order posts from celebrities and influencers. It’s a near total dealbreaker for me right now.

2. It’s not global yet. Despite what we may think, Americans aren’t the only ones we should be listening to. The EU still hasn’t approved Threads due to major privacy concerns.

3. There aren’t any hashtags or direct messages. I’m having problems following any topic I might be interested in because I literally can’t. Reddit and YouTube have become my new homes for knowledge seeking and connecting with like-minded others.

Right now, this leaves me in a state of almost 100% disinterest to engage with Threads. Sure, I’ll log on to see what is going on. But the experience at the moment feels very much like a bogus journey. The fun and novelty of its newness, along with that wishful nostalgic thinking of what a new community tool could bring to us, is lost, buried under “MILF Monday” content that is somehow dominating my timeline at the moment. It’s a far cry from the once harmonious “Follow Friday" trend on Twitter.

Just as Bill and Ted had to take on the android versions of themselves in 1991’s sequel to the movie referenced in last week’s newsletter, I’m beginning to see the social media version of me as a different version of my own self and I’m not loving it. Much of this is due to a lack of strong engagement on any platform, which allows me to sit back and further analyze what I’m putting out there as opposed to quickly being distracted by comments and replies.

I’m not as popular on social media as I once was and this is okay. Perhaps victory in this battle of remaining relevant on social media platforms is choosing to let the online performance slowly come to an end (or at least moderated) to experience more real world interaction.

THE VERDICT: It’s okay to feel a bit disenfranchised on social media as you get older. The real world outside of it awaits.

Less Deep(ish) Millennial Stuff of the Week

• TACO JOHN’S CONCEDES TO TACO BELL. The phrase “Taco Tuesday” can now be used by all because (opinion) Taco Bell is a big giant corporate bully picking on smaller chains. Also, legal bills when fighting a giant with much larger pockets can get expensive. (NPR)

• MILLENNIALS ARE HIDING MONEY FROM THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS. Like Stone Cold Steve Austin always said when giving financial advice, DTA - don’t trust anyone. (CBS)

• MILLENNIALS LOVE GOOOOOOLLLLLLLDDDDD. The latest hoarding craze is not toilet paper. (Insider)

• GEN Z (AND TO BE FAIR, MILLENNIALS) FEEL LEFT OUT IN ONLINE MEETINGS. Grow up. (Insider)

Millennial Commercial Spotlight

You’d have to be living under a rock right now to not see how impactful this blonde haired doll from your 90s youth is infiltrating popular culture. From mainstream cable news to social media, all anyone can talk about is…

Okay, fine. This is a swerve. I’m going to be the only marketer not to talk about you-know-who this week.

Before the Marvel cinematic reboots came, might I dare say this 30 second spot promoting Cap Toys’ reboot of the Stretch Armstrong doll super awesome action figure was the best live action crime-fighting sequence we were exposed to on our small screens?

In this clip, we are treated to an intro sequence of the most cliche bank robbers in the history of bank robbers robbing a “Bank” to much of the audience dismay. Enter our hero, the best blonde-haired figuring who also stretches to incredible lengths to combat crime. After reaching out to stop the getaway car, around 14 seconds in, the commercial takes a sadistic twist as we view two of our own Millennials torturing poor Stretch. Apparently, Gen Z has once again stolen from Millennials and have found new ways to mistreat Stretch. Sickos.

Curb Your Millennialism wants to take this time to salute you, Stretch Armstong. Even a failed Netflix series in 2017 couldn’t erase you from our Elder Millennial minds. Since 1970, you’ve put up with enough abuse. We hope you are enjoying a relaxing vacation somewhere, free of any arms that can attempt to destroy you.

Millennial Album Spotlight

After sitting on the Curb Your Millennialism porch, we decided it’s time to share more on the music we love with our official “Still Rocks” stamp of approval for the best music of the greatest generation. This week, the West Coast is on our mind. One of the best to capture its essence is no other than the Red Hot Chili Peppers as they proved with 1999’s Californication.

I could put most of the RHCP anthology on this list, but Californication came at a formative time in my life where I was about to enter high school. The return of lead guitarist John Frusciante after a long hiatus from the band was enough to get me to play this album on my Sony Discman and my Fender over and over again.

Exploring the light and dark sides of their homestate, RHCP peaked in terms of commercial success with this release with standout songs including “Around the World,” “Scar Tissue,” “Otherside,” and its title track, “Californication.” It’s a perfect play to get you through these hot summer days.

Listen here.

That’s all for this episode…

Before I go, a little about me:

I’ve been in omnichannel marketing, business development, sales and operations for startups and big brands alike for over 15 years now. If you’d like to talk with me about consulting, find me on LinkedIn, Twitter and now Threads or reply to this email. You can also book some time with me on MentorPass. Or you can get creative, I know you have it in you!

Thanks for tuning in. Until next time, keep dreaming of Californication…